Wednesday, 11 March 2009

Lost s05e08 - Discussion - A long time ago on an island far, far away

As I write this in 2009, Lost has been with us for over four years, and during that time as viewers we've become increasingly fond of the characters on screen. It's always been difficult to remember that in the timescale of the show Jack, Kate, Sawyer et al have only known each for 100 days. As the show resurfaces each year promising to be more epic than the previous season, the romances are distorted to Gone with the Wind proportions. Characters might get kidnapped and become physically distanced from their current loved one, but those between-broadcasts weeks only amount to a couple of days on the island. Jack, Kate and Sawyer might have seemed like an epic love triangle, but it's really nothing more than a holiday romance, a bit of fumbling under the peer with a few longing gazes at the burly man who runs the donkey rides along the beach.

What they've always needed is a timescale that reflected the shows grandiose lofty 'meaning of life' storylines. This week a fade to black, and a weighty 'three years later' finally delivered that.

But let's allow these posts some kind of semblance of structure, and follow the events as they panned out narratively, if not chronologically. The episode starts where Locke left off, and the island gets a brief visit to the very-past that's been hinted at but previously unseen. Juliet, Sawyer, Miles turn at a spectacle in the distance, and nerds everywhere get that funny feeling they normally associate to being near girls. Finally, after three years of teasing, it's the giant four toes statue! We're going to see the indigenous people of the island, it's going to be ama - FLASH! Oh, well that's that then.

Obviously their encounter with the confusingly scaled man of rock was going to be a brief one, as perhaps the era in island history is of such significance that the producers are leaving it until the next, final series. We do have enough of a visual reference to have a few stabs in the dark though, and to put those 'it's Locke/Ben' theories to rest. From the posture, and his classical education, Ferg reckons it's one of these chaps, the name of whom escapes me now. From the headdress it looks Egyptian. Is it Anubis, or some God of Fertility? The internet seems to think so. With the issues with childbirth on-island resurfacing in this weeks episode, I'd hedge my bets on his origin being related.

Who's to say this is even the time of Four Toes' heyday? He could have stood on the horizon for centuries, ignored by black rock survivors and then destroyed by these US army chaps who rocked up in the 50s. They brought a fucking hydrogen bomb, so I doubt preserving National Trust listed attractions was high on their list.

One thing we do know though is that preserving themselves is of a high-priority for the DHARMA crowd that we now find ourselves settled within. They've got a new Head of Security, and he's got some drunk portly Island-inhabitants to keep in line. When the Geronimo Jackson dancing (and possibly alternative love-triangle-'ing') troupe rock up in Otherville knocking on the door of this La Fleur chap, we're none too surprised to find it's Sawyer but with a slightly less bristly beard. He's had to keep his long flowing locks for the Davidoff retainer, but it's still quite clear that quite a considerable time has passed.

Back to the time-survivors, staggering about the well, and there's further time confusion. When they stumble upon mourning Daniel, how come recently deceased Charlotte has disappeared during the time-jumps? We know non-organic matter has traveled with them before, and I'm pretty sure Dan was clutching her quite tightly. Is this just a plot-hole in the pop-sci-fi that conveniently does away with the need for a lengthy funeral scene, or does her now non-existence and subsequent vanishing act fit perfectly into the Rules that govern the show? I'll go for a bit of both, but we won't be finding out anything about it for a while as time-traveling seems to have been paired down to the strictly linear variant for the time being.

As that paragraph moves to this one, I myself have suddenly traveled two months into the future. Due to my new flat's lack of broadband and a computer that my May 1st self would joke has caught Swine Flu, I was unable to finish this blogpost in my leisure hours. Not only does this one end a bit abruptly, but now I face the arduous task of writing up a review of three episodes that weren't actually very good. One thing that I do need to add was what gave the title to this post. My Lost-viewing partner Mark pointed out if the survivors landed in 1977 and were looking for a reason to go back on the sub to the mainland, seeing Star Wars in that Chinese Manns Theatre on day of release might be a pretty fucking good one. His other comment was that Sawyer will be chuffed once he arrives in 2009 to find that the entire population of East London approve of his lumberjacks shirts.

Sunday, 1 March 2009

Lost s05e07 - Discussion - Driving Mister Crazy

Since the very first few episodes, with then-unknown possibly-paedo Locke teaching Walt how to play backgammon on the beach, Lost has used Black and White as a device that divides characters and events. The use of polar (ho ho ho) opposites in a show where questionable actions are carried out by morally ambiguous folk means as viewers we're constantly trying to see whose team who sits on. Characters' actions are only 'bad' from the viewer's perspective, as they've been to their own means. Locke's allegiance, and the reasons for his submarine-exploding, father-killing 'bad' days, has always been to the island/Jacob, and so should any judgment we reserve for him be applied to it/him? Each week we are finding out more about the man pulling the strings. If it turns out he's a villain, Locke most certainly is too.

The episode opens with an immediate answer to the niggling question from last week. It seems the plane did crash, and that the producers have found enough DHARMA-ruppees down the back of the Hanso-sofa to buy another real plane. The conspicuous passenger aboard Arija Airlines is apparently called Cesear, and is indeed going to have a speaking role in the show. The question is whether that future-found water bottle was his, or if we're going to have yet another minor character knocked off the show for Driving Under the Influence in Hawaii. He's not looking for booze in the abandoned looking Hydra though, just guns. The lack of lights and general grimy decor imply this is definitely post-2005. Perhaps the plane landed on the runway Juliet joked they were making prisoners Kate and Sawyer build back when they were smashing rocks in season three?

Locke is 'reborn', and sits amongst his new gang of survivors by a campfire dressed like a Jedi. I can't be the only one who wasn't entirely surprised by this turn of events. Ever since he was included in the gang that had to go back I've assumed he'd suddenly start living again once he did, as Christian/Jacob seems to have done. What interests me more is the nature of his death and what could possibly have lead him to kill himself.

Oh, one more point about the AA-ers-era story. It added a great sense of the series itself being reborn. I had at times that exciting feeling of the unknown that stayed with me through the first series of Lost. With a whole new group of survivors we have fresh perspective through which to view the wonders of the island. Events even mimicked those of the Pilot episode, with Locke shown joyfully munching on found fruit. No 'Godfather' grin to camera this time though.

Off island Locke too regresses to earlier themes. After a few series of knife-throwing and Ben appeasing, he finally gets back to playing the victim he played so well in season one. He's back in a wheelchair, which obviously helps, but it's the futility of his quest that makes you pity him. None of the characters he visits have any reason to want to return, despite his detailing the peril their on-island friends are supposedly in. Kate's happy. Jack's drunk so he's definitely happy. Even Sayid has suddenly gone all Bob Geldof, building a barn for some poor folk, taking a breather from killing people.

His driver in the John Locke Comeback Tour 2007 is Matthew 'The Wire' Abaddon. It turns out he isn't some exciting third party interested in the island, he just works for Jimmy Widmore getting people to where they need to be. His Lost career seems to have been cut short by with his premature death, so perhaps he was sipping some of Widmore's lovely expensive Whisky between shots and he's gone to join Ana Lucia and Libby in minor cast-member heaven? We might not have seen the last of him though. Once again fans are joining the similarly coloured dots together and suggesting that Matthew is Walt but older. They cite how he shrinks back out of the way of Locke when speaking to the sprouting youngster as his character avoiding creating a paradox.

When Locke does eventually end up about to hang himself in a hotel room because he simply has no place in the outside world, like that chap from Shawshank, we're treated to what will probably be the best scene from this whole season. Benry turns up like Morgan Freeman should have in that film, as if on cue, to talk him down and build him up. Can Ben save Locke, and change his destiny? Will these events directly influence the Jacks-Dad's shoes wearing Locke, being the reason he comes back to life? Morbidly though, we're all actually hoping he does die. Meeting one's maker is much more interesting than sitting around talking about your feelings. And when he does, strangled to death after telling Ben he knew of Ringlady Hawkings, it makes the almost-avoided death more shocking.

Did Ben change his mind, and realise Locke had to die? His martrydom certainly leads Jack to attempt suicide and then get the band back together. Was it really Daniel's mother's name that lead to his about-turn in emotion? Perhaps if Locke had been at her spooky DHARMA-church discussions would have lead to Ben not being allowed to return. Jack's Dad said that it was Locke and not Ben who's destiny it was to move the island, and that Ben had merely fucked the wheel up enough to give us four or five exciting episodes of time-travel on-island. If he's just a clutz, and not once of the Oceanic 6, he becomes unnecessary plot-wise. He'd surely go and sign up for whatever part-time gigs Rose and Bernhard do.

Now we've seen him turn on someone he professes to care for, are we to believe once and for all that Ben is evil? From the way Jimmy Widmore's been helping Locke out we're clearly being thrown into an ethical spin. No-one wants to be backing the wrong horse/polar bear, especially when you've got the Island of Fate and an all-powerful judgmental Smoke Monster that's running the show. Both sides have done bad things for 'the greater good' in order to help them maintain or take-back the island. Our survivors have always questioned the bad and supported the good in regards to these actions that have been taken.

Was Charlie a good guy once he rid his body of heroin, even if he fake-abducted Sun? Was Sayid's brief island stint as a non-totrurer an indicator of him being more good than bad, or should we measure him more on the killing he's done since leaving? Ever since Benry Gale got caught in Rousseau's trap we've been aware of 'good people', but no-one is ever suggested to be 'bad'. It is the viewer's willingness to divide cast members into 'goodies and baddies' that the islanders reflect. There are those of them on their side, and 'Others'.

When this division was merely location-based on the island, it was simple. The introduction of Penny and the Freighter people changed it to 'those on island' and 'those approaching', but we were still watching one tangible group dealing with the other. Now the show has widened it's scope to include characters around the globe, and our main leads have become the 'Others'. Does it even matter at this point which one out of Ben and Widmore is good or evil? I reckon this whole feud will eventually be put down to some Trading Places style bet, and that they're both pretty reprehensible people. As Locke suspected this week, he's just a pawn in someone else's war.

Now that he's back though, I'm excited to see how Locke will have changed by his brief visit to the afterlife. They've messed with the format of the show so much these past two seasons with flash-backs/forwards/sideways that I don't see a flash to heaven/hell out of the question.

Thursday, 12 February 2009

Time-travelling blog: 2005 - Lost s01e024 - Discussion - Artz and Craftiness

My head is still ringing from this final jungle-trekking, hatch-opening, character-exploding episode. We have a whole two-hours to muse over, so let's get straight to it.

We finally got to see the much-mentioned Black Rock, as the French Woman instructs the lostaways to march across the jungle to find the dynamite hidden within. It turns out it's an old boat, and not a rock at all, and it sits in the middle of the jungle. Quite how it got there is anyone's business. Either it dropped in from the sky, or the island itself moved somehow. I guess it's the vehicular equivalent of a Polar Bear in the jungle.

It turns out dynamite is a temperamental substance, a lesson that costs recently-introduced Artz his life. After seeming to become set up as a major character for the second season, the poor chap explodes all over Hurley, Jack and Kate. Whether this means we'll see other cast members knocked off so suddenly in future is the subject of much speculation. Despite being many viewers favourite, I'm pretty sure Locke will die early next series. He served his purpose being 'at one' with the island in this first series, but could we really endure another 24 episodes watching him turn slowly into some martyr?

Introducing characters in this show is always going to be tough. Surely Lost only exists as long as the survivors of Oceanic Flight 815 do. If they try to introduce more characters in future seasons I'm sure the fans will be vocal in their anger. There's only so long they can promote background characters to regulars though, and it's not as if they're just going to have new folk rock out of the jungle every week.

The raft containing Sawyer, Walt and Michael sails out to sea, and for a moment I allow myself to think they'll find rescue. I'm aware that a second season has been commissioned already, but if Lost ended now I think it would stand as an almost perfect piece of television. Every character has gone through an emotional epiphany in these past twenty three episodes, and for them to return home changed people would be a wonderful sight to behold. Jack and Kate will probably get married, Charlie would re-release his album now he's escaped death, and Hurley will probably give them all a huge chunk of his millions! It would just have been a shame Boone didn't survive until the end of the series. Let's hope none of the other thirteen characters meet the same fate next series.

Instead of rescue the raft is met by a mysterious group of rag-tag bums on a boat. They are going to have to "take the boy", and whisk Walt off after blowing up the make-shift boat Michael had spent so long building, twice. Their small trawler chugs off out of sight, and the last we see of the our sea-bound suvivors is Michael yelling "Waaaaaaaaaaalllllttt". Quite who this group of people are is a mystery fans are obviously very excited about, and theories range from them being the much-hyped 'Others' to 'the 815 survivors but from the future'. Both these seem implausible though. Ethan was the leader of the Others, and had supernatural strength, whereas this bunch looked like they'd set off for a days crab-fishing. As for the idea of time-travel, I'm not sure even a show as rooted in fantasy would ever go fully sci-fi. Plus, I doubt Jack would could ever pull off a beard.

I do hope Michael survives though, as he's my favourite character. The others have family and other loved ones to get back to, but his devotion to his son is the most compelling storyline. If, as I said above, Locke takes a lesser role in the next season, I hope Michael steps up to become a challenger to Jack's 'hero' role.

On-land, after a convoluted idea to hide in it to avoid attack from these 'Others', Jack and Locke finally blow the lid off the hatch and stare down into the void. Rather than on any kind of revelation the first series of Lost ends with two men carrying torches shrinking away as our view falls slowly downwards. Fans are understandably a bit miffed. They've invested twenty four hours in this series, and at the moment the payout is as varied as anything that could possibly exist down a long tunnel. Theories therefore haven't changed from earlier in the series, and we'll just have to wait until September to see if any of them is even close.

Is the hatch a tunnel to the centre of the island, where a crazy old scientist is controlling everyone's mind? Is it the system of travel for the mysterious smoke monster? Is it a fallen space station, or an alien craft? Is it a Truman Show style window into the real world, and our survivors have just been partaking in an elaborate reality TV show? For all we know they'll just climb down on a rope and be greeted by some chap who's living there who doesn't know WW2 ended. Whatever it is, fans will be equally excited and annoyed I'm sure.

Bring on September.

Sunday, 8 February 2009

Lost s05e04 - Discussion - Udder udders

This episode involved a lot of setting-up, moving characters around to be in the right place for future events. There's a lot to ponder and speculate over though, so I'll get straight to it.

On-island the survivors decide they're going to race back to the beach to ride the Zodiac dinghy around the coast so that Locke can kill himself travelling in time at The Orchid. Quite how they're so sure the little boat will still be there when time itself is falling apart around them I'm not sure. Apparently objects they had with them when Benry Gale moved that giant icy wagon-wheel around are travelling too, meaning that a gun, it's limited ammo, some hairspray and half a sandwich are also getting a whirlwind tour of the history of the island. Why didn't the camp move? What would happen if you held Richard Eyeliner's hand when the flash of light struck? Would you yank that from his never-aging arm and take it with you to 1988? What if Daniel would have followed through on his mother's assumption that he fancied her and made a move? If the sky turned white during would he literally have snogged her prim little face off?

On a more serious note, but still musing on the ludicrous idea that anyone could ever travel in time, how come Cindy isn't travelling along with the other survivors? Just to refresh the memories of those who don't browse Lostpedia as diligently as myself, she's the 815 stewardess who crashed in the tail section, was abducted by Others and was last seen staring at Jack in a cage. Her affiliation is now with that group, and not our plane-crash based 'Losties'. This might explain why Juliet is time-travelling whilst other Others aren't, since she officially joined their camp at the end of season three.

Locke spots Desmond's light, signifying that time-wise an angry season one him is sitting on top of the hatch banging his fists in anger. So rather than see another perspective on an already perfect scene, (and my personal favourite of the whole series) instead we get an all very convenient re-play of Kate helping her future adopted son being born. Sawyer watches on longingly, and a million female fans stop the fast-forwarding they've been doing since episode one where he took his top off. Lit by candlelight he's almost tearful, looking but not able to touch, like he's a customer at a particularly niche stripclub: 'Watch women pulling objects from each other's vaginas in a jungle'. Hang on, the next 'flash' is to 1988 right? Who's to say he doesn't steal Aaron, take his top off again and become the original Athena Poster man?

Later, he confesses to Juliet how affected he was by the whole ordeal. Although refreshingly frank for a show where none of the characters seem to discuss the amazing events that happen to each other, why are characters waiting until now to do so? Was Jack not equally shocked when he saw his father in the woods, both emotionally and because he's dead? Or when Jack met Desmond, a man he recognised from ten years previous whilst running up and down stairs at a stadium. Perhaps I've answered my own question there. Jack is a dick, and should be considered seperate to any theory about the show.

Off-island Jack is still being a dick, albeit one who's understandably in need of a drink. Quite how he's coping with keeping things together without falling back to his very recent ways I do not know. Amid the resuscitation and custody battles, I keep expecting him to turn to camera like in Airplane, saying "I chose the wrong day to give up prescription drugs and alcohol". He seems fine though, and sets off investigating who's trying to claim custody of Claire's toddler Aaron. I can't have been alone in assuming it was Ben all along. Claire's mother doesn't have the acting abilities to have more than a guest role, and we haven't seen that chap from The Wire at all this season. It all ends with everyone apart from Hurley at some docks, where the actors all stand around smugly realising their show is looking increasingly like an episode of 24.

On-island the survivors finally make it to camp, only to find that it's been ransacked. They find a bottle of a drink that they linger on far too long for it's name not to have some significance, and then head off on their 'outriggers' (canoes). Once at sea, a mysterious group behind them paddling on their own giant canoe starts shooting at them. This scene is mysteriously devoid of any real clues as to deduce who their attackers are, which leads to me to believe this is a significant new plot thread that the characters are just stumbling through. Like the sea-billies on the boat in season one we're only given a glimpse of these people, but they'll become hugely important in the large-scale story of Lost. There's a whole website about Ajira Airways for fuck's sake, so we know this is going to be big.

Briefly, here are some theories about where the survivors are, and who their attackers were:
-They're the older Oceanic 6, who've just re-crashed on the island on a flight from India. They're shooting at Sawyer, Juliet et al because they don't recognise them and think they've stolen their boat.
-It's the exact same boat only slightly in the future. They are shooting at themselves. Theory falls down on the difference in their canoes. Our chaps' one is a double, whilst theirs is a single.
-The crash is an alternative Oceanic 815. Because events in the past have been changed, the flight Sawyer and Locke boarded never crashes. This one from India does, and so it's passengers assume everyone on the canoe to be 'Others'.

The bigger issue that none of these theories seem to mention though is where did all the the canoes come from?

This all pales into insignificance compared with the first major character-related 'reveal' of the new series. After a further flash the survivors are greeted by an almighty storm, and paddle ashore. Our attention is suddenly turned to a small group of people on a circular raft, who appear to be speaking French. They spot something just out of reach, a figure on a piece of debris. Pulling him closer whilst facedown, (so as to delay seeing his face until the music kicks in,) we see that the man is Jin, who's been un-knowingly time travelling for the past few days. His rescuers are of course a lovely 1988 round faced Danielle and her team of scientist explorers, and it seems after four years of spouting mental stories from her little island shack we're finally going to see her backstory.

The details of her past, or that which we know about it, are quite sketchy. We know that her crew got the 'sickness', and that a chap called Montand lost his arm. Then apparently they all started killing each other. But this was way back in season one, where the details of the island's past and mythology hadn't been thought through yet. Since then we've got Purges and Incidents, Hostiles and Hatches coming out of our ears, and it was never quite sure how Danielle's vague story fitted in between them. More confusing was her relationship to Benry Gale, who seemed to be the father of her daughter Alex. In season four, before watching her get a bullet in the head, Ben confesses that he 'stole' Alex as a baby from an 'insane French woman', excusing the writers for some elements of the contradicting plot. Her story might be false, or elaborated. Whichever, it'll be interesting to see how they weave it into the rest of the island events. Are the whispers she hears in the woods our time-travelling survivors? Are our hero's somehow involved in Alex's kidnapping?

It was a nice comic touch to have Jin land on a beach again, not speaking the language of those around him. After finally learning enough English to discuss bomb defusal in season four, he's time travelled back to season two thematically. His understandable confusion, and from the way Montand was acting a bit agro toward him, leads me to think we're going to find the reason for the frenchman's arm falling off by the end of the next episode.

Thursday, 5 February 2009

Lost s05e03 - Discussion - Lock, Stock and a funeral

I think we can call them 'flash-middle-backs', these leaps back to three years previous that make up the third narrative timeline in season five of Lost. The gap between 2005's rescue and 2007's imminent returning excursion is being filled in much the way Flashbacks did for all characters' lives pre-crash. So now we get to see that Desmond knocked that Penny up pretty sharpish on his return, and that the island's magnetism hasn't harmed his plentiful scottish seed. Cue plenty of 'I love you Penny's, and a happy audience. As I've said before, Desmond has become the stable heart of the show. Where others have dabbled in prescription medication or become a hired mercenary, he's still just trying to be 'a great man'.

Desmond sets sail to Oxford via London, as obviously it's a suburb of the city. He parks his boat on the Thames, and before you can say 'cor blimey Mary Poppins' he's amongst the worst English accents television has to offer. What is it with Lost and the British? It seems an intelligently constructed show, but does no-one British live in Hawaii at all to give them some advice? If you use the word 'honour' in a poster for the Scottish army, there's a 'u' in it for fucks sake. Pubs don't look like 'Irish' pubs in the US, and certainly don't have Union Flags draped over the walls unless it's good old BNP meeting-place. Desmond does suffer from National stereotyping in that being scottish he's earthy, honest and a drunk, but certainly isn't written as shamelessly hammy as the people he encounters, who appear to be either cockneys or horribly toitey posh people. I hate to reciprocate in stereotypes, but are American scriptwriters and casting agents' entire knowledge of the UK based on watching Richard Curtis and Guy Richie films?

The woman Daniel seems to have left comatosed, and presumably drifting in time, is named Theresa. Is this the same Theresa that was Boon's nanny during the 90s, who died going up and down the stairs? He might have only briefly mentioned that back in season one, but as I've said previously this season is aimed purely at the eagle-eyed nerd. If nationality and hair colour are significant hints at character backstory I'm sure their actual names are moreso.

On-island the survivors are mistaken for the US army-men who have apparently confronted the 'native' islanders recently whilst trying to carry out Hydrogen bomb tests. This explains why their rifles and knives have been knocking about on the island since season two. Goodwin's knife was 'US army standard', back when we gave a fuck about the tail section survivors. It also explains pretty much all of that season's 'hatch' plot in a couple of lines of dialogue. The bomb dangling precariously on string must be buried as it has a leak. It will best be contained behind concrete and underground, and be released periodically every 108 minutes to the music of Mama Cass.

It'd be funny if during these 'flashbacks' they try to explain away other long-standing mysteries of the show very quickly and dismissively. Imagine if we stumble upon the primitive 'hostile' colony that communicates between tribes using smoke signals. Daniel Faraday Quantum Leaps into the scene and drops something scientific into the fire. Explosions occur, and he creates the smoke monster!

I'm being cynical of course, which is inappropriate for Desmond episodes because he's by far the most genuine and lovely character in the show. When watching this installment I was chopping onions at the time, which explains the odd 'time-displacement' occurrence that happened near the end of the episode where my eyes began producing water. Whilst arguing with Penny, Des reveals that he named his child Charlie after our favourite Hobbit Martyr. He died so that everyone else could survive, let us not forget. However, part of the premonition that lead to his death involved Claire getting on a helicopter too. Desmond not only carries guilt, but the knowledge that his involvement in this story is far from over.

On the island Locke is once again taking matters into his own hands, marching into mini-Otherville to demand to speak to the never-aging Richard Eyeliner. Just as he said himself in the future, Dicky doesn't remember Locke at all. He needs more convincing of Locke's leadership skills than the old 'Your future self told me' line. Locke tells him to go and witness his own birth in two years, and hands over the compass future-Rich gave to him. This means the compass is officially stuck in a time loop! Richard will keep it for the whole fifty years before handing it to Locke again, soon after which he'll hand it back again. Whatever that things made of it too doesn't age. Perhaps it's ability to last forever will at some point lead to an explanation about Alpert.

The chap called Jones is indeed a young Widmore, as predicted last week. He's a very angry young man who's not afraid of snapping a comrade's neck for the good of Otherdom. This also gives an explanation as to why Locke couldn't shoot him, if we are to believe their time-travelling adventures can never interfere and alter things they know to happen in the future. Locke doesn't say anything to Widmore of significance about his future though, perhaps because the news he has to endure fifteen years playing playing Jim Robinson before getting a decent acting role will cause him to snap his own neck.

The origin of more familiar characters are revealed when Daniel gets escorted off to the bomb site by an austere tight-lipped English-accented Other. She says he looks familiar and comments on his continual stares in her direction. Turns out Daniel's not demonstrating his lack of commitment to his just-revealed love Charlotte, and that it's a family resemblance he's checking the girl out for. She's his mother, the one-day Ring lady and basement-dwelling scientist friend of Ben. This being Lost, I'd hazard a guess that his father is somewhere on-island currently too. My money is on him being Widmore, for the following reason.

All three 'freightees' were born on the island. Miles was indeed the baby in Chang's crib in the first episode, and Charlotte stated she was in the season four finale. Seeing as in 2004 no-one's able to live through pregnancy on-island I'd guess these characters were the last babies that did. Their significance is the same reason the Oceanic Six must return to the island, as there must be some rules in the universe about not being able to 'create' life on an island that moves in time. Anything that's created has to stay within the crazy little world of the island, and so these three must return.

Charlotte's got a nosebleed now though, which doesn't look good. She's just been told by Daniel that he's very much in love with her, which is normally indicative that her plot loose-ends are being tied up and she's ready to be being bumped off.

Tuesday, 27 January 2009

Lost s05e02 - Discussion - Who Framed Hugo Rayes?

The second episodes of seasons of Lost are often hugely disappointing. After the jaw-dropping-ness of seeing they've crashed on the island/someone lives in the hatch/they've been captured in cages/they're going to be rescued the story must quickly address the lesser plotlines of the show and tell us what the B-Team are up to. So in the past we have had to endure such excitement as two men stranded on a raft, more about Kate being a fugitive and finding out that Sun once dropped an ornament. This time around though the 'B' team is full of 'A' characters, except they're in the less-fun future/present day. Story-line wise they're invincible, and so make it less thrilling viewing. I'm pretty sure no-ones about to die on the island either, but their predicament seems more dire and therefore, sadly, more awesome. Let's hope this way of thinking doesn't overflow into 'real life' and I end up going base jumping.

To summarise the off-island action, Hurley ends up taking the blame for Sayid's murderous actions under the instruction of Ben. He's confessed to the cops now and so we're going to have to endure a whole episode of plot-diversion where they break him out or there's a big trial. They'll dismiss his conspiracy theories as the mutterings of a madman, stealing whole chunks of dialogue from Terminator 2. "You're the one living in a fucking dream, Widmore!" Sayid nearly dies, but clearly won't. He's got the doctor with the worst track record in successful surgery looking after him, and this time he's coming off drugs'n'booze.

Ben's been visiting mysterious folk, carting Locke's body around in the boot. They stop off at a butcher just so that for a moment viewers think he's going to have ole Jeremey Bentham turned into chops. Perhaps if the island will cure Locke of dying anyway, being in pieces isn't much more of a challenge. It does mean it'll be easier carrying him around though, as the whole Oceanic Six could share the load. Plus, if they ate him it'd be a great way of smuggling him through customs. Ben ends his discussion with the Ladybutcher by pointing out again that "This is really fucking important as if we fail we're all dead", unnecessarily reminding the viewer that whilst not-fun or interesting, the off-island plot is the most important one. I'm getting tired of his speeches frankly. He tries to imbue the end of every scene with huge gravitas and grave significance, but ends up over-egging that particular plot-pudding. He also fetches a mysterious package from the airvent in his hotel room, which I'm only mentioning for it's reminiscence to a scene from a popular film of last year and the picture I got to mock-up: No Country for Old Ben.

On-island the remaining survivors get significantly reduced in numbers as they're attacked by various unknown groups. Neil Frogurt, mentioned in previous episodes and seen once pre-season five here, does a brilliant impression of Artz from season one and gets killed just one episode into his Lost career. He too dies whilst being annoying and shouting at a cast regular, a crime that must be considered on a par with getting caught drink driving by the shows producers. Other 'redshirt's die too, and run into trees burning. Sadly, the show stopped bothering with funerals way back in season two, and so the scene serves only to cull this fast-paced fifth season of it's unnecessary baggage. It's kind of like when people start to leave a workplace with increasing regularity. At first they get a card, a gift, a dinner and drinks, but by the time half the staff have fucked off people haven't got the energy to make a fuss. I'd wager they'll be an official "We're the only ones left" in a couple of episodes once Rose and Bernard finally die.

Their assailants weapon choice suggests our survivors could be being attacked by the earliest inhabitants of the island, and that they've slipped back into the very-past. are these the 'Hostiles', much referred to but never really seen? Well, no. Or at least we're not in Black Rock-era past just yet. The appearance of some Dharma-esque uniformed chaps in the woods suggests this isn't the early 1900s. They appear to have bad British accents, an affliction the show normally inflicts on off-islanders. Taking into consideration last week's posting about new character accent/skin colour judgements, many assume this chap to be a young Charles Widmore. He did claim it was his island after all, which suggested he'd been there before Ben ever had. Is he one of DHARMA's founders, or The Others/Hostiles? His jacket says 'Jones', but could be standard issue attire for someone who gets recruited and wants to remain unknown. Anyway, we barely have time to contemplate this because Locke turns up with a knife, again. Like Ben with his speeches, this is getting tired. His routine at the moment is to spend four or five episodes having a 'walkabout', then rock up in the middle of a crisis to kill someone. Perhaps it's the writer's get-out clause for difficult plot strands or awkward situations.

Another character who's being judged by their accent is the old lady who turns up at the end of the episode. She's using some exciting science tool that draws lines just to prove she's a scientist, and then walks upstairs to greet a familiar face, Benry Gale. Keen readers will instantly recognise her as Mrs Hawkings, the 'ring lady' from Desmond's first time-travelling episode. But this is Lost, and so every facet of her being is a clue as to her connection to characters or events in the show. She's a scientist, and in England.

**Puts on investigating hat**

Mothers are old.
She's someone's mother who's a scientist.
She's someone's mother who's a scientist that lives near(-ish) London.

Daniels Mother is the woman Desmond is looking for.
Case. Closed.

C+ Lost. Must try harder.

Friday, 23 January 2009

Lost s05e01 - Discussion - "Great Scott!"

Or "Oh Boy", the catchphrase of Back to The Future's televisual cousin Quantum Leap. That's right folks. After years of being teased with characters who could maybe or possibly have travelled a little bit in time, even if it's just their consciousness, we now have full blown Delorean driving, Phonebooth riding, Crater-in-the-carpark leaving TIME TRAVEL! If the labyrinthine plot of Lost events on and off-island so far wasn't enough to cope with, they've now opened up a forth dimension for potential mind-fuckery.

Bringing this aspect to the show comes with it's consequences though, as I'm sure it'll lose ratings as it slips one further step from a drama the casual viewer can watch and enjoy, and one closer to it's hardcore following of nerds. Notice that I didn't make a distinction in sex there though, which the producers of the show apparently do. The decision to have Sawyer topless for the first two episodes was to try to maintain the female audience's interest during these romance plot-lacking times. I don't know about other males reading, but when I'm worried women might not be paying attention, the first thing I do is take off my cardigan. I often do presentations in just my vest and socks, especially when talking about the more technical aspects of my work. Perhaps they should have got Jennifer Aniston to arrive on the island instead, so that she could just whisper 'This is the science bit, concentrate' before each time Daniel speaks.

Regardless, all that I'm concerned about is how the time-travelling process has made Sawyer put on weight. I guess that Davidoff money buys a lot of pies. Either that or there's a plot-hole, and we won't get to see how he was diverted to the time-travelling DHARMA bakery until Season six. Anyway, I feel I'm jumping in time in myself with this account of the episode so let's start at the beginning.

We finally get to see Mister Wickmund/Candle/Halliwax rendered at a better quality than crackly Super8 or cine-film can achieve, and learn his real name: Pierre Chang. Hardly exciting stuff, but what follows definitely is. After a nice sequence showing how his breakfast routine on island isn't as perfect as Desmond's in the season two opener, we see his filming of an orientation film, complete with Sawyer-alike cameraman, interrupted by some kind of disturbance at the Orchid station. Upon arriving there Chang gets to show audiences that he's not employed as the face of DHARMA just for the 'alternative medicine' baggage his ethnicity brings with him, and gets to prove his scientist worth yelling about the possibilities of time travel to a burly man digging the DHARMA Tunnel.

Chang Wickdlewax has a baby, the suspected identity of which demonstrates Lost's fanbase's lazy habit of always jumping on race as a method of grouping characters. In the past we've had the black child in the house that's visited by Miles being the son of also-black Mister Ecko, and Walt himself being a younger Ecko somehow. There's even been suggestions that Sun and Jin are related to Chang previously, or that he is a rival or her father's company. Maybe it's because the show does often make huge assumptions about stereotypes, or that they know that they've got an audience that will. In this instance, many assume the baby will grow up to be also-asian Miles, and his mother is obviously being considered a sister/mother/clone of Sun. I'm in no way suggesting the writers have some hidden agenda with the show though, the characters' other physical qualities also define other tangible aesthetic groups. Back in season one when the then-monikered 'Sea-Billies' stole Walt from the raft, the origin of the blonde woman who threw the device that blows up their raft was under much speculation, but it never really amounted to more than scouring the cast for other yellow-haired folk. 'Molotov woman' was rumoured to be an older Shannon, or Claire sans baby.

Whether or not all these connections made by fans will ultimately turn out to be true, the show is definitely made with the understanding that these things are implied. When Juliet turned up in Season 3 looking similar to Jack's ex-wife, she tells him that it's no coincidence that Ben sent a blonde that is reminiscent of her to try to win him over. Similarly, the producers deliberately cast ever actor because of their ethnicity, hair colour, height, weight and age because in a show where the minutiae of each episode is poured over, these factors are as legitimate as a prop or some incidental music, and as important as a line of dialogue.

Good grief, I'm seven paragraphs in and the opening credits haven't even run yet. Chang talks about 'rules that can't be broken', echoing Ben's discussion with Jim Robinson about the murder of his daughter by tiny-mouthed Keemy, and shoots down the DHARMA-driller's suggestion of killing Hitler. Seeing as none of the cast of Lost have moustaches we can assume that we won't be able to knock-off any of his descendants, clones or younger-versions-of either. Or at least not till Season six.

But we knew all this, and nothing so far is a great revelation. My jaw is very much shut. I'm hoping to get more than someone just talking about time travel this series, and so far nothing particularl... HANG ON! Isn't that DANIEL from the freighter and now island? HOW DID HE? WHA? Is this this the present or the past? To echo Charlie's series premier closer, "Guys, where the fuck are we?"

It's all quite simple. It seems the Islanders are now floating in time, or that the island is. But not the Others. Locke is, despite being an Other. Richard is at some points, and apparently not at others. There are rules about it that mean nothing can be changed, except Desmond is exempt from this and can. Perhaps it's his game, like when people play Monopoly and everyone has to accept the ridiculous variations by which everyone plays it. Do you have to auction up a house if you land on it and don't want to buy it? Or it's his birthday, and so no-one minds if he sneaks a few extra houses on Old Kent Road. They're shit anyway, and there's no way he's going to win. It's like that, but time-travel. Simple.

Because it's so complex, you have to be real fan to even grasp the basic events that take place in this episode. With every time the survivors end up in, the surroundings they find themselves in denote different periods of the show and it's mythology. If there's a hatch they could be in any time from the 1970s. If it's got Desmond in it it's 2001-2004. If it's uncovered it's 2004. If it's blown up it's post 2004. If there are barracks it could be any time since the 60s, but if the people living there aren't wearing DHARMA uniforms it's post-purge and therefore post 1993. If the barracks are empty it's post 2005. If you're still reading and haven't just skimmed through my listing of dates and events, thanks very much.

This all makes figuring out what's going on on-island quite difficult, but for the possibilities in the storytelling I think it's worth it. If the islanders are taking part in events we've previously seen from other perspectives, and bearing in mind the much-mentioned point that 'nothing can be changed', who's to say they've not been seen previously, creeping about so as not to be seen in the background. Remember back in season 2 when the tail-section survivors considered The Others to be mysterious, almost ghost-like beings that walked barefoot and didn't leave tracks? That didn't turn out to fit with how the Crazy Cult Member Others turned out to be, but what if it's because there were Other Other's? If the time-traveling survivors have to be careful so as not to be noticed, what better way to creep around than barefoot?

This also puts a different perspective on other events in the show's past. If the survivors succumb to the obvious want to change the fate of some 815-ers, who's to say they're not related to the whispers that are heard in the show, often around times of dramatic incident? Maybe it's Sawyer, Juliet etc standing behind trees going "Pssssssst!!! Shannon! Someone's coming to fucking shoot you!" But, you know, a bit more mysterious and etherial. Maybe when past characters re-appear in what we have generally dismissed as imaginary or dream sequences, it's an actual message from the future and not just another day of paid-work for Boon.

Someone who seems to have moved from a guest start to cast regular is Richard 'Eyeliner' Alpert, who turns up during Locke's travels to pull a bullet out of his leg. Locke's journey seems to have similarities with Desmond's in previous seasons, as it is hinted that there's some connection to his consciousness as he jumps through time. He appears to be affected by 'other' Locke's, at different time periods or locations. When he approaches the crashed drug-plane and gets shot in the leg by Ethan, is this the reason his legs failed back in season one when he was in the same location? Were those wounds echoes from the past? When Alpert hands him a compass it links their encounter up with the one he had/will have/is currently having as a child when he is offered the different items and asked "Which one do you already own?" Are these events happening simultaneously, or will Locke end up regressed to a child as his next destination in time?

As for the off-island activity, I couldn't really give a fuck. Just as last season some of the cast were untouchable once we realised they were destined to leave the island, now that they have to go back we all know they're going to have to survive. No matter how many awesome killer washing-machines Sayid can kill people with, it's never going to be exciting seeing the characters run around like a sub-plot from 24. I'm sure it'll be thrilling in parts, but this feels very much like the 'let's lock them in cages for six episodes' plan from the beginning of season three. Plus, Jack should have kept that beard.

Lost - Pre-Season 5 Recap - There's probably no Jacob, now stop worrying and enjoy your life

There is just over a week before Lost returns to our screens for it’s 5th season, so I thought I’d get my giant icy cogs turning and crank up this email group for another year of theories, rumours and commentary.

**Takes a deep breath**

When we last saw our heroes, six of them were living miserable lives in the future (our past) having escaped the Awesome Magical Island (in the ‘quite past’) on a rubber dinghy. After much deliberation and debate amongst this group it was revealed that one of them was baby Aaron, and the others were Kate, Jack, Sun, Hurley and Sayid. Benry Gale escaped the island too, but that was by time-travelling from the ‘quite-past’ 2005 to the ‘relatively recent past’ 2007, which means he’s not one of the Oceanic 6 as no-one knows about him. Besides, he wasn’t on the plane and time-travelling is cheating.

Also not on the plane, Desmond has returned to his beloved Penny, who in the 6 months off-screen is probably now pregnant with a son who everyone will assume to be Jack. Or Desmond himself. Somehow.

Sayid is a big fat murderer, working for Ben killing all the people in connection to a chap called Jim Robinson Widmore. Quite why ‘he’ isn’t the one in hiding seeing as he’s running around shooting people escapes me. Perhaps him and James Bond can form a duo of Very Famous People Who do Secretive Jobs.

Sun is pissed off because her husband was blown up on a boat by Widmore’s people. She’s also pissed off at her Dad because he made her husband a really nasty piece of work who went around threatening people in return for money. She vows to solve all these problems by blackmailing her father with threats and making friends with Jimmy Widmore. I’m pretty sure she has a plan but we know nothing about it.

Jack and Kate went out for a bit in the gap between the ‘quite past’ and the ‘middling past’, but he got hooked on drugs’n’booze by the time we saw him again in the ‘relatively recent past’. Plus he grew an awesome beard, but she still wouldn’t take him back. She’s probably still in love with Sawyer, who sacrificed himself, kind of, so that the others could survive and escape on a helicopter. She’s bringing up Claire’s baby, who disappeared with Jack’s and her’s dad. Claire isn’t in this season though, as she’s probably doing The Hills Have Eyes 3 or something, so all we’re going to see of her is ghostly apparitions come the finale. The baby saw far too much of his surrogate mother looking hot for him to not have serious oedipal issues come puberty, so I’m putting my money on him somehow growing up to be Jacob. Or Jack’s dad.

Hurley went proper mental, so now he lives in the same institute he was in prior to the crash. He sees dead people all the time, which is a brilliant ruse to get dead ex-cast members to do guest spots. Walt came to see him and he was considerably taller than before, and his voice had broken, but this was okay because this is the ‘relatively near past’ and people are a little older there.

Locke turned up in the ‘relatively recent past’, but he was dead and no-one went to his funeral. His name is apparently Jeremy Bentham, which could either have been something they’d planned to do for years, or something they had to pretend they knew about when high-res images of the article detailing the at that time ‘unknown’ man in the coffin’s name started appearing on the internet. Regardless, he died after having visited everyone and telling them about the really bad stuff that’s going on on the island to their old friends.

So now they have to go back. All of them. And I know I’m repeating my write-up of the finale here but if that includes Locke does it include Walt? Also, does it include all the people who are blown up in the ocean? Is Walt going to have to go and sift his father’s remains from the sea before returning with it in a sack on his back, C3P0/Chewbacca style?

On the island Locke is still alive and the head of The Others. He doesn’t know it yet but one of his flock, the perpetually eye-liner-ed Richard Alpert, has been following him his whole life. He’s still convinced that the island is his destiny, and that he’s it’s Jesus/Obama, so doesn’t intend to leave anytime soon. Likewise for Charlotte, who we don’t really care much about as they had to cut episodes explaining her backstory from the last season due to the writer’s strike. It turns out she was born on the island, and is back looking for her home, so her ‘C.S.Lewis’ name and Narnia connection wasn’t a coincidence. She’ll probably turn out to be Ben’s daughter, from that girl he was in love with as a child. Not that they had baby when she was a child. That’s just wrong.

Other than that there’s constantly nervous Daniel and angry Miles. Miles can speak to ghosts, which will be useful when the dead characters are making guest appearances with slightly longer hair. Daniel can travel in time, kind of, but his most useful asset is bringing a sense of panic and stress to the group with his wobbly voice.

I forgot to mention Frank, the least interesting new member of the team and the one most unlikely to be in Season 5. He rocked up on a boat, landed on the island, rescued seven people, got on another boat and probably won’t be seen again. I hope this is because he’s signed up to star in Planet Terror 2, as I saw the first one the other day and he was the best thing in it.

So now, the new season will fill the gaps between the ‘relatively recent past’ and the ‘present’ and the ‘wherever the fuck the island went’.

**Breathes out**

Here’s the trailer:


Lost s04e13/14 discussion - Titanic 2: I'll take Korea Sun!

We’ve now all had about two weeks to watch, re-watch and generally digest the 2 hour (if you watch it being broadcast) finale of Lost, so here’s my final despatch of the Season, and year. First off, in general I loved it. Not as awesome as previous finale’s, but I’ll get to that later on.

Every Lost finale has to be the most action packed of the season. Whether it’s Artz/the hatch/the raft blowing up, hatch explosions, or all the shooting, dynamite and car collisions of last year... They’re always going to resort to the most easily crowd-pleasing events at a time when our cinema screens are doing likewise. And now, it seems, we get a one-man-fighting-machine every year too! After showing us “that break dancing thing you do with your legs.”, as Hurley put it, we now get a three minute punch up between old torture-hands Sayid and Keamy small-mouth. Pretty awesome stuff, were it not for the fact that ultimately he loses the fight and has to be helped out by the one male cast member who wears eyeliner. I foresee the very last episode of Lost consisting of nothing but three hours of Sayid going all ‘Kung Fu Hustle’ on a bunch of Widmore minions.

Another character who similarly has a dubious past that seems to have been rectified rather hastily is Sawyer, who this episode finally commits the act of martyrdom needed to push him fully into ‘acceptable poster boy’ for all the teenage girls watching. Aside from the future episode where he cradles a baby whilst riding a white horse along a beach away from the burning orphanage, I don’t see what more he could really do to stir get the chicks’ loins a-stirring, frankly. Juliet was drunk already when he Davidoff-ed his way out of the ocean. All he has to do is explain how he sacrificed his own survival for the good of his friends, and hey-presto, more island pregnancies! Oh, and in case you don’t have super-hearing he whispers “I have a daughter in Albuquerque, you need to find her. Tell her I'm sorry" to Kate. I quite liked the way this scene tied into the Flash-forward where Kate obviously goes to see the baby, to Jack’s annoyance. Having said that, on the helicopter, I think it would have been a funnier solution, and a return to the ‘badass’ Saywer, if he were to whisper to Kate, snog the face off her and then push Hurley out.

When, Sawyer-less, they landed on the freighter, it was nice to see that Hurley didn’t even get out to help with the re-fuelling. He is a fat bastard, which to some degree, must have come from being a bit lazy, so it’s nice to see that when it comes to a situation of helping-out-all-your-friends-or-you-may-all-die, he sticks to the character he’s developed for four years and stays put.

There’s no way Jin is dead. Michael is dead, and there’s a link about that later on, but no major cast member gets to leave on Lost without the audience getting to see it happen, or the internet becomes all a-flap with ‘theories’; the currency that keeps the show alive during these long summer months. He’ll pop up in Season 6 with Claire, in Jacob’s crackers cabin, or up Jacob’s ladder, or in his Creek.

Keamy is dead, his small mouth breathed it’s final breath and the boat blew up. Was anyone else surprised by this ‘revelation’, about that being the explanation for the iPod Nano attached to his arm? I think we predicted this three emails ago, and it seems sloppy for the show’s standards for them to think it wasn’t quite obvious. What I thought they would do was have the timing between Keamy dying and the boat explode lead to some big revelation about the differences in time between the island and the boat. I know people are saying ‘but wasn’t he miles underground, wouldn’t that signal have stopped as he went down in the lift’, which is a valid point. But in the world of SCI-FI, which is much more important than radio signals as it is MAGICAL, the two places were supposed to have been existing in some exciting way regarding time that Daniel just ‘ummed’ and ‘you see’-ed about all season.

Regardless, he’s dead, and Ben killed him, which was jolly dramatic. What I don’t get though, is Ben’s change of heart that the people on the boat are no-longer anybody to care about. Wasn’t he warning Michael four episodes previously about how ‘innocent people’ don’t deserve to die? I don’t buy it. It’s almost like he’s been built up now as this oddly moral character in the show, like Locke has but from the other end of the good/bad spectrum. So now the writers just think it’s great complex character development to have him do morally questionable things, as they know we know he’s on the road to salvation as A. Good. Person. and so every act of ‘bad’ he does on the way will have people theorising furiously. I just think it’s shock for shock’s sake, and that he’s just a bit selfish and a dick.

Ben does move the island though, and even has a little cry while he does so. As I mentioned in my last email, he did indeed ‘leap’ straight from The Orchid to the desert in 2005, at the cost of apparently never being able to return to the island. He spins the ridiculous giant Wagon Wheel one notch, and the whole place disappears from view in a way not dissimilar to dropping a new Widget into dashboard in Mac OS X. Is this possible in real life? No. Does it fit into any kind of theory, storyline or theme of the show so far? No. But I’ve been watching this show avidly for four years now, and have long since given up on any hope of some kind of logical, sensible all-encompassing solution it. It’s very silly, and it could well be marked as the final jump over the shark that the show makes.

For many viewers, I can see this being the point from which they lose complete interest in Lost. As far as they are concerned the main characters have gotten off the island. The island itself has disappeared. What more is there to say or do? Two more seasons of megalomaniacs using their huge multi-national corporations to chase down a few Oceanic 6 fugitives across the globe? I can imagine when the show does return in Spring 2009 there will be a huge further drop in ratings, as the ‘mysterious air crash survival’ show just starts to look like any other high-gloss crime and espionage drama on US screens. And then there’ll be a huge resurgence of interest when in 2010 they do go back to the island, at which point critics will probably point out that it’s just replicating the raw, exciting mystery of the first season...

But let’s keep positive. We don’t know how and when the next season will even be set. I think it would be foolish to continue the ‘now’ narrative on-island as when the island is moved. So much has been said in the flash forwards about the off(, and briefly on,)-island events that it seems we need to jump forward and pick up the story at Grizzly Jack recruiting everyone to return. That way we can have NBA Walt rejoin the cast, get to see what the Locke-lead Others are up to versus the army of children Sawyer has fathered in the three years past. Then I guess we’ll find out about Jeremy Bentham, Widmore etc in flash ‘back’s explaining more about the huge global conspiracy that keeps Jim Robinson in acting roles.

Because. They. Have. To. Go. Back. All of them. Even Walt. And Locke’s body. What about Jin’s exploded body? Is someone going to have to carry his parts on their back for Season 5, a la Chewbacca and C3P0, until they return and the island ‘cures’ him of being blown up? What about Michael? Jesus, I don’t want to be the one who has to sift through the ocean to piece enough of his remains to chuck into a DHARMA rucksack before their return.

Some links
Michael is not happy about his short return, and calls ‘racism’. Finally, my two obsessions meet:

They shot an extended scene of the Oceanic 6 Press meet-and-greet:

They also shot multiple reveals of ‘who is in the coffin’, to prevent spoilers:

Well, I hope you’ve enjoyed these 13 emails picking through the minutia of a television show that probably should have ended after it’s first season. I’ll be back in January 2009 to do the same with the 17 that air from then. If anyone has any suggestions to keep this Lost thread alive during the summer months, feel free to send anything.

See you in another life brothers and sisters.

PS - Thanks Tom for the Jacob jokes. And Michelle for the ‘Davidoff’ thing, as being a heterosexual man I really don’t know what it is.

Lost s04e12 discussion - Slow motion always makes me tearful

Bit of an odd one this week, as this episode very much plays out as the first act in a film. The characters are all rather hastily being put in place for a forth action-orientated finale. Still, it was nice that this year they’ve gotten the ‘walking through the jungle to find something/one’ over with at this stage, rather than it making up the bulk of the coming two hours. We now have everything in place for a big old fight at the Orchid, and another one on the freighter. Good. Stuff.

Lovely scene at the start, when they all step off the plane to be greeted by their families. They pulled the old ‘slow it down and play the slow and sad version of the theme tune’ trick, which isn’t that cheap at this point. I think when they had scenes like that where Hurley was just unloading food from the Swan Hatch back in Season 2 it was a bit forced, but this was the scene many people had been waiting 4 years to see and it delivered the emotional punch that was necessary. Kate being totally alone was nicely heightened by Hurley’s inclusion of Sayid in his reunion with his family. Remember that at this point, her mother, the hotter aunty from Sabrina the Teenage Witch, is presumably still bed-bound and not on speaking terms with her daughter. Likewise, Sun hugs her mother but ignores her father, as island revelations have lead her to hate him for what he made her husband do.

The press conference was a bit silly. We’re still in the dark as to who made the fabricated story, and to what degree it was fabricated. If it was Oceanic, how come the woman offers them to do a press conference, which they could have refused? We know the story is made-up, but at which point does the ‘story’ end? Did they really land on the small island in that little raft, or was that photo taken on the beach part of the fabrication? It seems Hurley is wearing the same t-shirt he’s had on-island for a few episodes, which lines up with those events taking place within the life-span of an on-island change of clothes. . The island they claim the six people had lived on for three months was called Membata, which is apparently Indonesian for ‘doubt’ or ‘uncertainty’. Also, these two people we hear survived the crash but died on the small island, is that real too? Do two more characters die in the escape? I guess we’ll find out next week.

Plus, everyone at that press conference was acting really dicky. Why attack Hurley for being fat? Why probe Sun about whether her husband died on island or on the raft escaping? Surely they’d all have been briefed to be double nice to all of them if they’re really going to be such huge celebrities? I can understand people being a bit cynical, and often with good reason, but no-one was going to go to that press conference on the return of Shannon Matthews and yell “I reckon you faked her getting kidnapped so you could leave your paedo man-child husband and shack up with your uncle” to her mother.

The island-themed party was funny. I love the idea that Hurley’s parents just think he was on holiday for three months.

I’m really not interested in Sayid and Nadia. He fucked someone else, and she’s dead in the future. In fact, all three women he’s slept with in the show are dead. He must have some kind of barbed-cock-weapon, from his time as a torturer.

Jack knows he’s Claire’s sister. We all knew this, obv, but it’s still nice to put future events in context.

What is the point of Charlotte? She better do something pretty fucking spectacular in the finale, or she’s the most worthless addition to the show since spending half of Season 2 trekking across the island to retrieve fucking Bernard.

So, I guess, now we sit and make predictions for the huge two-hour (one hour and twenty minutes for us torrent-fans) Season finale spectacular. I, for one, am pretty pumped about the whole thing. For once, we’ve got island events with an end-point we’re very very close to we’re just filling in the dots as it approaches. We know six characters have to end up on that raft by the time the episode is up, and so will be watching in anticipation every time they decided to hang out together. Does the island move and leave them off it? Will the boat explode if Keamy gets killed? That iPod Nike + thing stuck to his arm last week seems to suggest it. Does Jin die? Will Claire sober up? What will The Orchid be like? So many exciting questions, and they’ll all be answered! There’s no way it’ll just give us more questions! They’remakingitupastheygoalong!!!! ETC!!!!

Lost s04e11 - Discussion - I can move move move any mountain

This weeks Locke episode was not the flash-forward that I had hoped/predicted we would get. Instead, being as we’re in Season 4, every flashback has to be so chock-a-block full of previously dead characters or amazing coincidences so that fans don’t get annoyed. Two years ago, an episode that just revealed Locke was a lonely child would have sufficed. Now we have to have TIME TRAVEL shoved in between each ‘wooooooosh’ or people switch off.

Richard Eyeliner is back! And this time he doesn’t attempt a period haircut! It seems the writers have fully embraced the theory that he doesn’t age, and run with it. Either that or he can travel in time. So now we find that Locke was monitored his whole life, foreshadowed the Smoke Monster (which was a bit ham-fisted. What next? He made DHARMA-logo cookies too?) and in general was pushed by characters we believe to be DHARMA or Widmore related to his ‘destiny’ of living on the island. I like it, as it suggests a reason for all the amazing coincidences in Flashbacks we’ve seen for the past 4 years. It supports my theory of there being some kind of GREY-HAIRED DAD CORP that every character is related to in some way. Everyone has absent fathers, as has been said many times before, and many have fathers in some way linked to Widmore, Paik Industries or DHARMA. Have they all, like Locke, been visited by people poking and pushing them to fulfil their destiny on The Island?

That Keemy chap is suitably repulsive, and him and his iPod Nike thing he’s got strapped to his arm will die some horrible death by the time the season is up. The other Freighter related action was all jolly exciting, and hopefully building to something explosive for the finale, which begins next week.

Ben, Hurley and Locke walking through the jungle was a bit rubbs though. All the musical cues seemed to suggest it was some big surprise that Ben had killed all those people, but even a casual viewer would have picked up on that as there was a whole episode last season. Plus, it seems they’re trying to undo two seasons of building up Ben as a terrifyingly confident and powerful character. All the shrugging of shoulders and loss of faith this episode was reminiscent of Locke being rubbish in season 2.

As for the whole Cabin nonsense. I’m not sure. Clare was acting like she did when on drugs in Ethans care in the Staff hatch, all jokes and without a care in the world. This seems to follow a theory I mentioned last time about whether she is indeed already dead. Christian was again acting un-characteristically. I’m hoping they’ll very quickly get to the scene where Jack finally meets his Father again on the island, and finds out about his sister, as on his own he’s just not very interesting.

Next week should be exciting. Maybe LOCKE DIES!!!?!?!?

Lost s04e10 - Discussion - Some nice booze back home

Last week’s Jack Flash Forward was more of a joining in of the dots exercise than I’d have liked. He needs to get hooked on booze and drugs at some point between now and when Grizzly Airport Jack emerges, and this episode showed how our beloved doctors life is heading this way in the future and present day respectively. It’s all a bit pointless having him suffer from a dicky appendix when we know he’s untouchable, so that whole episode was only really useful in showing what a wally Jack is thinking he can stay awake during surgery. The whole Rose and Bernhard discussion about how it was odd he got sick when others got better on the island was interesting though, maybe this plays part of the forming of the Oceanic 6.

Future Kate is incredibly hot, and that child, non-biological though he may be to her, is going to have some real oedipal problems growing up. Interesting that Jack remarks “You’re not even related”. Did he emphasise the ‘You’re’? At this point does he know he’s Aaron’s Uncle?

On-island, Sawyer is further being set up as a possible love interest for Clare, being all Athena poster-boy looking after the baby.

The oddness of Christian Shepherd frustrates me though. He’s not alive in the future, but a ghost. He’s got physical form on the island, and can talk to Clare. He also acts a bit strangely. I guess it just wasn’t as awesome to see him as I thought it might be. He just struck me as just another island apparition.

There’s an interesting theory going around that relates to something said all the way back in series 1. When the psychic said to Clare that she must take Oceanic Flight 815 to LA, as there’s a couple there that can raise her better, was he foreseeing all the island events and referring to Kate and Jack? But, he had also said previously that he mustn’t be ‘raised by another’, which people took as significant once ‘The Others’ rocked up, until they were revealed to be just a bunch of spiritual scientists who obey the commands of a garden shed.

Lost s04e09 - Discussion - Now 100% Shit-Actor Free!

Good episode, huh? I think it was just what was required at this stage in the show. Fast-paced and full of revelations, with at least 3 big huge WTF moments that satisfy even casual viewers. Talking of which, Sawyer seems to represent the casual viewer each week these days. “Isn’t Michael that character we haven’t seen since the end of Season 2?” a couple of weeks ago, and now every week helping out those who aren’t lucky enough to be on this mailing list keep abreast of current events on island.


Things that were good:

Ben appearing out of nowhere in a fucking Dharma Parka (‘Dharka’ is the name being bandied around on the intersnetz currently) in the middle of the fucking desert. Then showing how he has +8 fighting skills taking out some locals on horseback. I believe when he set the co-ordinates for that particular teleporting adventure he just typed in ‘awesometown’. The un-subtitled dialogue between the two has been translated as being something along the lines of “But there are no tracks?”, just to further the excitement. More speculation on that later.

The purge of all the bad actors and actresses of Lost. Awesome. I don’t think I was alone in actually belly laughing at how ridiculously short the parts played by redshirts 1 – 3 were. Out the door, bang. Next! Bang. Next! Bang. Okay, we get the point, they’re baaaaadddd. Then the killing of Alex. Brilliant. Totally unexpected. I noticed they never actually showed her being shot, even with the shows later US timeslot, which just goes to remind us how shocking an execution by bullet to the head is to audiences, and was intended to be to father-figure Benry Gale. For the first time in the show he genuinely seemed to have run out of ideas, and the whole way her death affected him seemed we’re now well on our way to witnessing Benry Gale: Actual put upon Good Guy. I also really liked the way his last-ditch attempt at saving her, by revealing that he stole her from a mad woman when she was an infant, totally undermines everything Rousseau said about her crew, the sickness, being French even. The writers must have been thinking about quite how to get out of that plot hole during their 3 months strike.

Then, finding out Ben had this one last trick up his sleeve the whole time, and getting the smoke monster to attack the bad guys. Very nice sequence. The monster now has elements of light in it, which makes it a little prettier. Or possibly it’s more any missions carried out at night, so it doesn’t get lost or bang into something/kill something it shouldn’t. I think Ben does not know how to control it, but does know how to turn off the Magic Sonar Fence and possibly attract it to him. Then, seeing as it has been alluded to before that it can ‘judge’ people and only kills those who aren’t ‘good’, just let it do it’s things on the morally questionable soldier-types.

Things that weren’t good:

Sayid married that Iraqi woman. Rubbish. As I’ve said about Jack before, you can only fall in love with so many people before everyone stops giving a fuck. Pick one and stick with her, as seems to work with Desmond’s morally pure episodes. What the fuck was Shannon now? And that woman he will fall in love with in the further future? I know one-dimensional characters are not normally a good idea, but when a show is as complicated as Lost, you really need characters to do one thing really really well and stick to it. Jack is a hero, and in the future he’s not, which is why we care. Sawyer is a crook but is now quite nice. Sayid tortures people and then stops for a bit and then goes back to torturing. Leave it at that.

Ben meets Jim Robinson. I think I’m alone in not really liking this bit though. It was quite good in a way. He’s there drinking whole bottles of Desmond’s career from his nightstand and discussing probably the. Whole. Point. Of. The. Show. To his arch enemy. There’s tension. Ben reveals he’s going to get Sayid to kill Penny. All very exciting. But the whole “You changed the rules” thing is what I can’t swallow. I can’t help worry that in fact the whole show is going to be explained away as a gentlemens bet about Time Travel or something. That’s not to say stealing plots from Trading Places is always a bad idea, but I’d rather they’d taken the bit where Jamie Lee flashes her boobs if anything.

Things to think about:

Ben appeared from no-where in the desert, wearing a Parka and breathing as if he’d come from somewhere very cold. The name on the jacket is Halliwax, one of the names Marvin Candle of the Orchid Station goes by. In case you’re unaware of this, here is his Lostpedia page: He’s gone by Wickman too, all Candle related names. I am very much in the dark why this is. Also, he appears to have a fake arm, which goes in line with Ben arriving in the desert with a cut on his. So many theories as to how he got there. Did he come from the Listening Station, a very cold environment that the two Brazillian chaps live in and report to Penny from? Or did he come from the Orchid Station, only yet seen in this 2007 Comic Con video: There seems to be some kind of teleportation going on there... One thing is clear though. He lied to Sayid about how he got there, so it’s certainly not the method by which The Oceanic 6 will leave/left the island.

Lost s04e08 Discussion - "Cause it's getting better"

The big one! The episode we’ve all been expecting since it was revealed in July last year that Harold Difficult to Spell Surname was re-joining the cast! Now we can finally find out what he’s been up to since he left the island! How did his little Popeye boat get back to the mainland? Did he get picked up by another boat??????!?!?!?

As is often the case with Lost, they don’t answer exactly the questions we were asking. I really enjoyed this episode, but when Flashforwards seem to be building a more comprehensive picture each week of the post-island activity, we really don’t expect to be left hanging about details occurring in the characters’ past. I really hope they’ll reveal at some point how he actually came to get back to New York, but it really might not be relevant by Season 5 or whenever. Perhaps they’ll put it in when Michael inevitably dies in some ridiculous heroic act as his final flashback. Who knows? Maybe the only reason they didn’t show it was to avoid having to deal with Taller Walt and the difficulties that come of having a 6 foot man tie shoes to his knees and kneel for all his scenes.

As for the rest of the episode, I liked it. The whole way he was recruited by incidentally gay Tom Friendly was pretty cool. The way he’s seemingly invincible, very good. I really hope the next episode opens with everyone on the frieghter trying to shoot, chop up or drown Michael but failing each time. Bullets ricocheting off his belt buckle, or knives snapping as they cut his throat. Ho ho ho.

On island, the Acting Guild of America gunned down two of the worst three actors in Lost. Shame, as I was hoping we’d get a Rousseau flashback at some point so we could figure out what’s really going on with the whole Alex thing. As for Alex, she’s defo’s preggers. The way the camera lingered on her holding her belly as only pregnant women on telly seem to do...

Right, that was longer than expected. Sorry. Perhaps I’m MAKING IT UP AS I GO ALONG?

Lost s04e07 Discussion - "Guys, when are we?"

I have to say I think I almost predicted this whole trick flashback/forward thing a few weeks ago. Around halfway through, I figured that there was some wool being pulled over people’s eyes and that the off-island activities of Jin and Sun around various childbirths would not play out as straightforward as they seemed to be doing. As I said about the beginning of Juliet-centric ‘The Other Woman’, they’re really playing with the format and expectation from the viewers. Is it past, or future? Is she/he part of the Oceanic 6? All very exciting. There were little hints throughout... The Flatscreen TV in Suns room showing Nikki in ‘Expose’ in contrast to Jin’s shitty 2000 mobile phone. Also, Jin’s behaviour. Did no-one else think as he threatened the cab driver that drove off with his giant Panda that if this is really post-island he’s kind of turned into a dick?

I don’t think it was tricking the audience though to pull the old switcheroo in the final scene. It’s exactly the same device they used in the first flashforward with Jack, it’s just they have to go further to disguise it as the audience gets more savvy. It was worth it, a big punch in the emotional gut when you realise that Jin is dead in the future (present, or, in actual fact, our ‘past’.) It’s one thing to have a character die in the current on-island timeline, but there’s something hopeless about knowing someone’s inevitable fate. Does he die as one of the 2 of the supposed 8 who escape the island? Will it actually occur on island quite soon?

Also, we have a timeline for when they get off the island. Within 3 weeks, or Sun would have died. And we have a good idea of when this flashback took place from the duration of a pregnancy, Mid-2005.

He’s dead though. There’s no way they’re going to that grave to show him the baby if it’s just a symbol and he’s actually still on the island. Yes, the headstone listed his death as September 22nd 2004, the day of the crash, and so there is some element of covering up, but if Jin is not buried in that grave I simply don’t think his widowed wife would go to it in order to communicate with him in some spiritual manner. Surely Hurley and her would have gone to the beach and spoken out to the open sea? And certainly less need to wear giant ridiculous suits...

Oh, and Michael is on the boat. But we knew that.

Lost s04e06 Discussion - More Friendly with a moustache

Right. First off. After such an awesome episode last week that dealt with time travel and all the excitement that comes with that, they were going always going to have trouble following it up. Fact is, last week was pretty much an All-Desmond Supersode, but the programme is actually an ensemble piece about the lives of around 12 characters. They have to keep ‘touching base’ with all the different storylines going on, or people start yelling ‘What about the Black Smoke’ and speculating that the show has jumped the shark, or that they are ‘making it up as they go along’. I dipped into that mindset at some point a couple of weeks ago and then suddenly... POW! TIME TRAVEL. I think it’s part of the show’s appeal that each week can have a totally different ‘feel’ due to the nature of the on and off-island stories being told. Sayid is always violent off-island, Hurley is funny, Locke is emotional and Jack is always a plum. Anyway, that was last week. Let’s look at what did happen this week.

The beginning was great! Juliet being revealed as a ‘celebrity’ was a great example of how the show plays with it’s audience, realises themes and plays on them. I for one was already planning my very angry email about how she wasn’t on the Oceanic flight when it became apparent at the appearance of moustached Mr Friendly that this is, in fact, on-island but in the past. This is the stuff which I really love about the show, which perhaps puts less avid viewers off... The fact that it is the most scrutinised piece of television ever created is reflected in how they write the show. Every detail, from location, to dress, props, haircuts is key in actually hinting or revealing major parts of the story. It’s not just in-jokes and esoteric shout-outs to nerds on the internet, it’s their method of storytelling. For instance, the whole Flashforward at the end of Season 3. Jack has a beard, so we cannot place this event in the timeline of Lost, where he’s never had facial hair. He is listening to Nirvana’s ‘Scentless Apprentice’ in his car, which, if contemporary gives us roughly the year 1993. He’s depressed and popping pills, which based on our knowledge of the character from previous episodes puts these events after his break-up with Sarah. But that was post-1993, surely? And didn’t he go to Thailand and get some shitty tattoo’s? When does he fly to LA to pick up his dad? In fact, he later mentions his dad being upstairs in the hospital. When the fuck did this episode take place? Then POW at the end they reveal that it it in fact post-island, and it’s the actual surprise of the whole season. They. Get. Off. The. Island. Woah. The details of the production so obsessed over by people such as myself were methods they used to throw us all off the scent, and the payoff was actual drama, not just a big old nerd-circle-jerk.

I reckon their next ploy will be to show what looks like ‘now’ and to have it reveal to be a flashforward. I’m holding out for a Locke on-island flashforward of 2 years to do this.

Anyway, I’ve gone off the point.

Jack loves too many women. How many possible love interests has he actually had? Sarah, Kate, Anna Lucia (briefly at the airport) and now Juliet. And how many times has he got to do the no-pants dance? No wonder he’s so fucking highly strung.

If Juliet looks like ‘her’, who is ‘she’? I reckon it’s Annie, his childhood sweetheart. She was blonde, and it’s never been confirmed or denied that she died in the Purge when he gasses everyone. A theory is that she was the first to die during childbirth, giving birth to Ben’s child, and is the reason he’s so dedicated to solving the ‘women dying during childbirth’ thing that seems to happen on-island. I felt sorry for Ben at points in this episode. He cooked a ham and everything...

The whole Daniel and Charlotte running across the island nonsense... Couldn’t really give a fuck. It’s all new new new just when people are excited to be getting some of the old old old sorted out in their heads.

Jim Robinson IS the big baddy. I was right! He can’t be in the remainder of the series though, as he’s here at Cambridge Circus every night doing Spamalot. So Widmore is trying to find the island, buying up parts of the Black Rock etc, as it holds some magical power? He gave the picture of Penny and Desmond to Naomi to trick him into thinking it was her boat?

Hang on... The boat was Libby’s, who gave it to Desmond. She was seen in a Hurley flashback in the mental institute, and there was much speculation at the time that she is part of Widmore, or working for him. The theory was that the husband she mentioned who died was killed by Hurley during that incident where a platform collapsed due to his weight, and so she was pursuing him on the island in order to steal his millions. But giving the boat to Desmond always seemed a bit odd... Maybe Jim Robinson employed her, making her give this boat of his to Desmond, allowing him to have his boatrace around the world. Jim Robinson knew this would lead this chap who he wanted far from his daughter anway, to the island of magic?

Further Libby speculation. After the description last week of time travel, constants and shifting consciousness making you seem a bit mental. What if the Lenny at the institution that Hurley used to hear the numbers is someone on-island trying to send the numbers to him? The way Desmond was chanting things he was trying to remember was he dipped in and out of present day consciousness did seem quite similar. Also, if Lenny is time travelling, maybe Libby was too? Perhaps she needed to go out with Hurley as he was her constant...

It’s Michael on the boat, isn’t it? Next week is the last before a short hiatus, as it flows better than ending on episode 8 apparently. Which means it’s a cliff-hanger, or some great reveal. Last shot is Michael, I would stake my Lost reputation on it!

Phew. That was long.

Lost s04e05 Discussion - There Will Be Nosebleeds

I’m sure you’ll agree that this weeks episode of Lost was awesome. And not just in the sense of introducing every nerds favourite sci-fi element: Time Travel, but as standalone good drama. The whole Penny and Desmond thing is pretty much the only relationship I care about in the show, and his flashbacks/sideways always hang off that old ‘unrequited love’ thing that most people can relate to in some respect.

Didn’t Penny and Desmond meet up at the stadium while Jack was running around it, in 2001 or so? How come she didn’t ever mention his phonecall then? Either that’s something the writers are ignoring, or it questions which type of ‘time travel’ they’re subscribing to...


1. You CAN change the past. Marty McFly CAN go back in time, change his father from a loser to a winner, head back to 1985 and find he’s a published author. He can also steal an almanac from 2014, head back to the 1950s, lose it to Biff, and return to a 1985 that’s all fucked from Casino’s and booze.

2. You CANNOT change ‘FATE’. John Connor has to send back his friend Kyle Rees to 1984, in order for him to have the sex with a pre-scary Sarah Connor and become his father. Likewise, Skynet sends back Terminators in time, parts of which are found by scientists, which lead to the development of Skynet! This theory is that if time travel EVER existed, it always has, and therefore it cannot be changed, as it already has been.

If the 2nd rule is the one that works, I’m hoping Future Rich Toby will come back any day now, with a cheque for a million pounds, so I can invest it, in order to become Future Rich Toby by 2030. Of course time travel is very silly, as it’s not really possible, but I think Lost did a good job of making it seem tangible in that it’s a ‘consciousness’ travelling about, and not ‘stuff’, which must be harder. But basically, you have to stick to one of those rules of Time Travel, and not fuck about with both. I would say that Desmond’s activity sits in the latter, but there are a few parts which make me think that they’re getting confused. Did Daniel’s book always have that note about Desmond, or was it added when he time travelled? Does this time travelling change the fact that Desmond met Penny at the stadium? All very confusing. I like to think that Daniel did just forget seeing Desmond, due to not wearing a helmet during those experiments, and that the series sits within type 2.

Ah! Remember when Desmond see’s the lady in the shop who refuses to sell him the ring when he ‘time travelled’ before? She says he’s not supposed to do it. That he doesn’t propose to Penny. Sounds very much like ‘fate’ to me.

Enough of that though.

Good to finally see the boat. Also, It was nice to hear Minkowski mention something about an ‘old friend’... I’m sure that was a big fat hint about Michael’s return.

Oh, and Daniel taught at Oxford, which is where Charlotte got her degree. I already got the feeling they’d shared more than just a helicopter journey together. Hello new island relationship! It’s all kept in for the girls, whilst us real men get a big fat lump of TIME TRAVEL.

The whole ‘Time Differences’ thing. Bugs me. How can a projectile being sent arrive 31 minutes late, and this 40 minute helicopter journey take over a day, and yet both boat, island and Penny in England all be at Christmas Eve 2004? Unless only the area round the island is running at a different speed. But Daniel said ‘on this island’, not around it.

A ha!!! Remember how I said a couple of weeks ago that it being Christmas is going to be a key point. Penny could be experiencing a different, later Christmas. 2005 or 6. The calendar on the freighter could just be an old one. Or a trick to ease them back into reality safely. Charlotte seems aware that telling people about time differences may be too much to handle, so maybe various props on the boat are designed to keep survivors comfortable during the journey back to 2025 or whatever.

Actually, there is a discrepancy. On island, it should be Boxing Day, according to Lostpedia:, and so it would imply that there is a slight time distortion, but it only amounts to 2 days. I believe this to be down to bad continuity in the show, and it’s supposed to be the same day. Christmas Eve is a better day for dramatic phone calls. Boxing day is rubbs, Penny would just be lying about bloated from all that DHARMA turkey.

I have gone on far too long now.


Lost s04e04 Discussion "I know it's in a box, but it's pretty damn good wine"

Lost wasn’t very good this week. Not ‘Rose and Bernard bad’, but close to ‘Jack gets a tattoo and fucks a Taiwanese prostitute’ bad. The title of this email was the one fun bit for me. Kate just doesn’t interest me, and all that courtroom stuff is just so ridiculous it makes me worry. There might be a certain audience the show has that just want to know who’s going to ‘hook up’ with who, but right now it’s the least interesting part of the show.

But, and I’m only saying this pre-empting Pablo’s reponse, Kate did look hot.

So instead, and on Liam’s recommendation, I am going to insert a lot of Lorem Ipsum here as my points of interest:

Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetuer adipiscing elit. Nam non libero sed tellus pretium euismod. Nullam imperdiet blandit nisi. Suspendisse potenti. Aliquam fringilla. Donec at lacus. Donec dui leo, rutrum in, auctor id, lobortis vel, diam. Mauris arcu mauris, lacinia at, ultrices ac, commodo vehicula, erat. Proin nulla diam, vulputate egestas, tristique ac, viverra ac, justo. Mauris laoreet enim nec lacus. Nunc id eros. Ut eget lacus. Donec tempus. Integer cursus. Cum sociis natoque penatibus et magnis dis parturient montes, nascetur ridiculus mus. Fusce gravida, justo vitae vulputate sodales, lectus lorem sollicitudin mi, a ornare lectus velit quis sapien. Vestibulum risus felis, aliquam vitae, condimentum at, dignissim a, ligula. Quisque porta leo vel dolor. Fusce justo nulla, auctor hendrerit, rutrum ut, lobortis quis, dui.


Why does Kate have Clare’s baby? Has she stolen him? Is Clare dead? Does Jack know all this?

Why is the ‘official story’ that 8 of them survived and 2 died? Why not just say only 6 survived? Do two dead bodies turn up that need explaining when they do escape on the freighter?

What is the big secret about Ben? He’s super rich, surely? Some kind of Widmore level multi-national company owner?

That’s all. See you next week.

Lost s04e03 - Discussion - "The old switcheroo"

I’m sure you’d all agree that that this week’s episode of Lost was awesome, and that the revelation that Sayid has become some sort of badass killer in the future is kind of cool. And didn’t he look lovely with straight hair? Here are some thoughts.

We can assume that the group Naomi is working for, perhaps lead by Abaddon, is the same group that the hot Berlin woman works for, as they had the same bracelet. Who is this R.G. Character then? The only character mentioned that it could possibly be is a Regina on the freighter. But it would imply that Naomi was a big old lesbian. I think we can also assume that, apart from Charlotte, these new island dwellers don’t know that much about the island, and they’re just as in the dark about some things as the 815+ group. They do seem to know who Penny is though, so who knows?

Was the reference from Sayid that ‘What I love about Europe is that everyone speaks English’ a reference to the fact that of course in his flashbacks the Iraqis all speak English, despite the fact Sun/Jin episodes they just subtitle Korean? Plus, was it a further dig that he then asked for an ‘expresso’?

The part with the little science experiment from Daniel Sciencesurname was really interesting. It seems explicit now that time does indeed run differently on the island to the outside world. If one moment is stretched out to an hour on island, it must mean that the 100 days on the island are only going to turn out to be about a week on the outside world... I think that that’s what the whole mentioning of the Red Socks, and the ‘I can’t believe I haven’t seen a baseball game in 100 days’ from Jack was about. They were interrupted, but I’m certain that at some point Frank is going to turn around and remark ‘What are you on about, that was last week?’. And as I’ve said before, it’s pretty much Christmas day according to island time, and I think very soon one of the characters, perhaps in Locke’s camp if Frank and Jack discover it on in the other group, are going to say ‘Happy Christmas everyone! Let’s all have turkey’ or something. At which point Miles will say that they’re being pricks and it’s only October. I’d put good money on this happening.

Other stuff. The group separating was good. Nice that it’s all gone Lord of the Flies. As for the whole Hurley and the moving house thing, I guess we see now that it really does. Bit odd. I don’t like ghosts.

Jack, Kate, Sawyer and Juliet. Well, I guess that’s all fine to play it’s course now. Love is for girls and homosexuals, and that stuff doesn’t really interest me.

Hurley’s line about the break dancing neck snapping was really great.


What is this as-yet unseen event where Sayid uses his heart and not his gun, as mentioned by Ben in the Flashforward? Is it about to come up as he lands on the freighter? Does he turn down an opportunity to kill whoever is in charge, Ben’s man on the boat perhaps, which jeopardises his friends?

Why is there a list? Are these people Sayid is killing related to the freighter group? Are they Hanso? How does killing them help Sayid’s ‘friends’? And which friends? Keep the Oceanic 6 a secret? But Hurley’s on TV shouting about it, and Jack is known as a ‘hero’. Surely he means the people still on the island? Killing these people prevents them from finding it and them.

How does Ben get off the island? What, apart from killing all those DHARMA people in the 90’s, has he done to make him such a wanted man?

Is Daniel fucking that Charlotte?

Phew. That’s it. Let the 1 line responses commence!